The Art of Appreciation

Love may make the world go round, but appreciation keeps us from flying off into empty space as our world spins on its axis.

To appreciate others and see value in the circumstances of our lives seems to require that we take an active role in those circumstances.

If we retreat into the role of watcher, never reaching out to catch a water glass falling off a table or holding the arm of a stranger slipping on an icy sidewalk, then we will feel like an army of one trudging alone in a barren landscape.

We need to notice others if others are to notice us. Noticing us, they will see us; and seeing us they will appreciate what they see. We don’t even have to be that special, because others would rather see what is in front of them than wander blindly in a fog, not noticing, seeing or appreciating the passing landscape of their own lives. Our noticing what they value will awaken the human faculty of noticing in them.

The alternative is to be a wallflower sitting under the clock at a high school dance, hoping someone will invite us onto the floor. Standing at the edge of things, we can die waiting for something to happen that we could set in motion ourselves.

A good way to be appreciated is to take the first step and reach out to someone who seems lonely and unconfident.

I don’t do that effectively or consistently myself. But when I do express appreciation about something or someone, as long as I honestly do appreciate it, something passes between me and another, leaving us both feeling recognized and more relevant.

Have you ever noticed that some people are pleasant to be around, because they see the good in others and are confident enough to point it out?

Those are the people whose secret power lights up the world around them. They are the ones from whose example I most want to learn.